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Gaynor Kast Blog

Tag Archives: siblings

Learnt from Lockdown 2

09 Sunday Aug 2020

Posted by Gaynor Kast in Uncategorized

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COVID-19, faith, family, grace, gratitude, Lessons learnt, life, Lockdown, Mother, Obedience, perspective, praise, Prayer, purpose, siblings, time, Worship

You will remember in my previous post, I mentioned that my mother was visiting so I wasn’t alone for the first part of our lockdown. Although I was working from home, literally around the clock, just knowing that she was here offered a degree of safety and security. Just the way a mother’s love can.

But, after a month she wanted to return to her home and my delaying tactics were not the strongest. I eventually took her back and then we were hit for a six. She had the most horrific health scare and ended up in the hospital; for the sake of her privacy, I will not go into detail suffice to say it was touch and go.

It was a time that my siblings and I can laugh about now because of how we all deal with stress and trauma, but at that time it was far from a comedy scene.

Fast forward to me returning to my place.

I was happy to be in my space and surrounded by all my comforts. But for the first time in a long time, I realised that I now longer wanted to live alone. I wrestled with God about this every other day. But then one day in my quiet time I realised that no amount of temper tantrums or irrational reasoning was going to force God’s hand in my life.

We know that His time and His plans are perfect. Like we read in Ecclesiastes, there’s a time for everything under the sun; and I’m not immune to these seasons. Yes, there’s free will but for as long as there’s grace to walk in complete obedience, that’s my choice.

I concede that while I completely understand all of this, I still have the odd moment when I ask “But why God?” And it wasn’t until very recently that I realised that instead of despising this current season of my life, I need to appreciate and make the most of it.

And it was only after this acceptance that I found the solitude and time in prayer, praise and worship priceless.

I could easily list reasons of how this pandemic has ripped the rug from beneath our feet, but, there’s one thing it has done that no money could buy. It drew us back to and closer to God. It put the daily grind on pause for us to recalibrate and decide on the kind of relationship we want to have with our Father. The kind that sees us speaking and listening to Him as freely and easily as we breathe; or one where we speak to Him when we are in trouble or “need” something.

And so, as we continue to take it one day at a time, allow me to encourage you to look for that rainbow. Draw from the wells of His word that offers boundless hope. And be present (taking social distancing into account) in the lives of those near and dear to you… even if it’s through voice notes and face time calls.

Keep the faith.

Keep safe.

Lighten up & live…

30 Sunday Aug 2015

Posted by Gaynor Kast in Uncategorized

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body, bond, brother, Cellphones, choices, deadlines, fabulous, favoured, life, Listen, Mangwanani Spa, mind, moment, Rejuvenated, Relax, siblings, Sister, spirit, thank you, time out, work

The day started out like any other. There was one exception; my brother and sister were in charge and adamant that the rules below needed to be adhered to:

* No cellphones
* No talk about work
* No time checks
* Just be in the moment

We spent the day at Mangwanani Day Spa to unwind, relax and bond like siblings should. They also told me in no uncertain terms that I’m “way too serious and need to lighten up”.

I’m glad I listened…

At the end, my body, mind and spirit were completely rejuvenated and I was a happy camper.

Every. Single. Moment. Was. Treasured.

It’s important to step away from the rat race of life and be good to yourself.

I hope you will choose to make time for YOU!

Thank you for taking the time to read.

Stay fabulous & favoured xxx

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Looking forward to…

18 Tuesday Aug 2015

Posted by Gaynor Kast in Uncategorized

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Alive, Authentically, Best days, Birthday, books, brother, chocolate, courage, experience, fabulous, favoured, Flowers, Friends, Fulfilled, God, good people, grace, gratitude, heart, Heartache, hugs, laughter, life, love, Nature, parents, Rain, siblings, Sister, Sun, time, Wind

I woke up feeling very emo. Not sad. Rather more thankful.

With another birthday just hours away I’m deeply grateful for the gift of life; and God’s grace showered upon me daily.

I jotted down a few things – that have shaped my journey – in my Gratitude Journal earlier and thought I’d share a few with you.

* Parents – need I say more

* Brother & sister – for keeping me grounded, the fights, laughs and memories over the years

* Cousins – they are an extension of my siblings

* Friends – for letting me be me and creating a safety net when I need it

* Nature – whether it’s soaking up the sun, feeling rain drops on my cheeks or the wind blowing through my hair

* Courage – to walk away from toxic situations & people

* Hindsight – go figure!

* Hugs – whether it’s to express appreciation or a sign of comfort and support

* Voice notes – from the special, little people in my space especially Eli and Leah

* Flowers – to remind that it’s really all about the simple things in life… that’s what makes me happy

* Chocolate – because… which woman can live without these comforting cubes?

* Books – when I need to escape nothing comes close to turning the pages of a good read

* Heartache – you haven’t lived till you’ve had your heart smashed into splinters and then for time to heal and make you whole again

* The future – I know this next chapter of my life is going to make everything else pale in comparison. That what God has in store for me no eye has seen or ear heard…

For every single moment I get to open my eyes & am blessed to declare that I’m ALIVE, my heart flows with gratitude.

P.S my birthday wish is: that YOU will live authentically & find fulfillment in every experience.

Thank you for taking the time to read.

Stay fabulous & favoured xxx

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Life’s little pleasures…

04 Thursday Dec 2014

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books, chocolate, family, Friends, God, grace, introspection, laughter, love, movies, perspective, siblings, sisters, sunrises, sunsets

I’ve been doing loads of introspection of late. In this fast-paced, diary-driven world, quiet time is essential.

I find that if I don’t make a conscious effort to shut off and out, it’s so easy to drown in the noise and pessimism. As an ardent proponent of the gratitude brigade, I got thinking about the things (in no particular order) that make my days more sunshine than gray skies…

· The grace of God – where would I be without salvation?!
· My parents – for the love, values and firm foundation in life
· My siblings – for the unconditional love, support and goofy times
· Family gatherings – the love, laughter and inevitable “drama”
· Purpose – knowing what I need to do and where I’m heading
· Friends – pure joy that should be bottled
· Mentors – makes learning and growing such a treat
· Challenges – the pain is what propels me to keep moving
· Books – I love losing myself in stories that offer perspective and insight
· Writing – how many get to play with words for a living
· Chocolate – need I say more?!
· Chocolate cake and fresh cream
· Peppermint tart
· Sleep – nothing beats a good night’s rest
· The smell of freshly cut grass
· The smell of mac & cheese or bread, fresh out of the oven
· Toasted cheese sarmies
· Sunday newspapers
· Mr Delivery for those lazy pj days
· Sweatpants and “home” T-shirts
· Long weekends
· Sunrises
· Sunsets
· Old movies – Casablanca, Gone with the Wind and the like
· Re-runs of Friends, Greys Anatomy, The Fixer

I think the one thing that I treasure the most is my “sisters” from another mother who know me better than anyone; and still love me just the way I am (*cue Billy Joel’s Don’t Go Changing). These “sisters” keep me grounded, give me strength when it’s needed most and generally keep it real.

Thank you for taking the time to read.

Stay favoured and fabulous x

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What I know for sure…

13 Thursday Nov 2014

Posted by Gaynor Kast in Uncategorized

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chocolate, choices, family, kids, love, marriage, music, parents, perspective, siblings, sport

**Disclaimer: this post is a tad long.

Yesterday a friend asked me how much I would share on this blog. My response : “How long do you know me?”

I’m the poster child for transparency. What you see is what you get. You know when I’m happy, sad or indifferent (which is rare).

 So…

My parents split more than two years ago and it was the most gut-wrenching experience ever. It was like someone had plunged a knife right through my heart. I had so many questions and sadly very few answers.

People say it’s easier when you are older. I beg to differ.

Here was a couple who had just celebrated their 40th Anniversary; these were the two people that my world revolved around. I spent many nights trying to figure out: What? When? Why? How?

To this day I cannot find the logic but have come to learn to trust the process.

Today, I’d like to share about my father (or Daddo as he was affectionately known). If you speak to my siblings they will tell you that I was always Daddo’s girl so it’s probably why I took the split the hardest. While I have no doubt Daddo loved us all dearly and unconditionally, Kalê (my eldest sister who had cerebral palsy) was definitely his little girl.

I remember quite vividly how they connected… and marveled at how he and my mother took care of her – as best they knew how. Having a special needs child is not for the faint-hearted. My parents excelled in this role.

For her petite, beautiful self (oh yes, of all the kids she was blessed with a peaches and cream complexion, long black eyelashes and hair that would put any Pantene ad to shame) she was quite a handful at times. Everyone thinks I’m a drama-mama but looking back I think I pale in comparison to Kalê. 

Because she couldn’t talk, Kalê and Daddo had their own secret code when it came to communicating – they would make these gurgling sounds or exchange looks that only they could understand. And not to mention those hearty fits of laughter they shared when he tried to do something comical to keep her entertained. Those images are forever ingrained in my memory. But I digress!

You know, my father was no saint but as I mature I realise that in fact none of us are perfect or without fault. Warts and all, in the bigger scheme of things he was a one in a million and we couldn’t have asked for a more devoted, caring father or husband; even on those days when he chose to take a vow of silence and sulk for reasons only known to him.

During one of our heart to heart chats he cried and said that there were many times he wished he had lots of money because there was so much he wanted to do for us. But, I allayed his concern and reminded him that what he instilled in us and gave us over the years was worth far more. His love for the Lord and unwavering faith was admirable, even when things seemed hopeless.

Some of the fond memories I have:

* We used to write little notes asking him for 50c (it was a lot back in the day) for school, and inevitably we’d find it next to our lunch the next morning.

* Friday’s were our treat day and I guess this is where my love affair with chocolate began.

* We’d never admit it (oops I just did), but Daddo spoilt us.

* Music – Peaches and Crème, The Manhattans, The Temptations, The Ink Spots (especially that song entitled the Gypsy), Frank Sinatra, Nat King Cole. He’d whistle the tune of Mona Lisa when my mother was nagging about something 🙂

* Sport – we’d sit with him in the wee hours watching marvelous Marvin Hagler (I’m really giving my age away now) and even Kalê would squeal with delight when uppercuts and heavy blows were exchanged.

* Soccer – United and Orlando Pirates – heaven help us on the days when Man United lost. I don’t even think Sir Alex Ferguson took their defeats so seriously.

Why am I sharing all of this?

Simple.

I may never know or completely understand why my parents went their separate ways. I’ve moved beyond the anger, pain and heartache. I’ve chosen to embrace the lessons from this part of my life’s journey.

What I know for sure: given the chance to start all over again and if God allowed us to choose our parents, I know we would all choose Daddo again.

Thanks for taking the time to read.

 Stay favoured and fabulous x

 

 

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