Tag Archives: family

Learnt from Lockdown 2

09 Sunday Aug 2020

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

You will remember in my previous post, I mentioned that my mother was visiting so I wasn’t alone for the first part of our lockdown. Although I was working from home, literally around the clock, just knowing that she was here offered a degree of safety and security. Just the way a mother’s love can.

But, after a month she wanted to return to her home and my delaying tactics were not the strongest. I eventually took her back and then we were hit for a six. She had the most horrific health scare and ended up in the hospital; for the sake of her privacy, I will not go into detail suffice to say it was touch and go.

It was a time that my siblings and I can laugh about now because of how we all deal with stress and trauma, but at that time it was far from a comedy scene.

Fast forward to me returning to my place.

I was happy to be in my space and surrounded by all my comforts. But for the first time in a long time, I realised that I now longer wanted to live alone. I wrestled with God about this every other day. But then one day in my quiet time I realised that no amount of temper tantrums or irrational reasoning was going to force God’s hand in my life.

We know that His time and His plans are perfect. Like we read in Ecclesiastes, there’s a time for everything under the sun; and I’m not immune to these seasons. Yes, there’s free will but for as long as there’s grace to walk in complete obedience, that’s my choice.

I concede that while I completely understand all of this, I still have the odd moment when I ask “But why God?” And it wasn’t until very recently that I realised that instead of despising this current season of my life, I need to appreciate and make the most of it.

And it was only after this acceptance that I found the solitude and time in prayer, praise and worship priceless.

I could easily list reasons of how this pandemic has ripped the rug from beneath our feet, but, there’s one thing it has done that no money could buy. It drew us back to and closer to God. It put the daily grind on pause for us to recalibrate and decide on the kind of relationship we want to have with our Father. The kind that sees us speaking and listening to Him as freely and easily as we breathe; or one where we speak to Him when we are in trouble or “need” something.

And so, as we continue to take it one day at a time, allow me to encourage you to look for that rainbow. Draw from the wells of His word that offers boundless hope. And be present (taking social distancing into account) in the lives of those near and dear to you… even if it’s through voice notes and face time calls.

Keep the faith.

Keep safe.

Learnt from Lockdown

08 Saturday Aug 2020

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , ,

When the rumblings of the COVID-19 pandemic started making its way into our lives via various media channels, it was hard to ignore. Then the heart-breaking and often horrendous stories linked to it were a lot to digest on any given day.

And still, I went about life fluctuating between a degree of calm and peace and sudden anxiety – always weaving their way into what was until then a relatively measured life. It was not until President Cyril Ramaphosa (South Africa) declared a three week lockdown period that I was suddenly gripped by fear and rolled into survival mode instinctively.

For someone who loves mapping things out, setting and meeting deadlines and steering the charted course, the start of the lockdown was difficult. I remember rushing into the supermarket before the lockdown kicked in and although I had a list of essentials to buy, when confronted with all those aisles of groceries and toiletries i went into a flat spin.

The neatly typed out list was deleted and I found myself throwing things into the trolley that I would not ordinarily buy because I was hit with the “what if…” thought. What if the lockdown is extended? What if supermarkets don’t open for the longest time? What if I run out of x, y, z?

Looking back now, I can’t believe I was “that” shopper. *Hides*

The other thing, as someone who enjoys her own space, it was the first time I was super thankful for having company in the form of my mother.

The reason she was visiting is because four days before the lockdown my brother and his wife welcomed the most precious baby boy into the world. Connor Luke Kast made his grand appearance at a time where things like chaos, confusion, fears, anxiety and depression were slowly but wilfully starting to wrap itself around our nation.

We had a Heaven sent antidote.

They say that a baby is a blessing and while I believe it, it wasn’t until Connor came into our lives that I fully grasped the real meaning of that comment. I desperately want to paint a picture of how I felt when my eyes spotted him for the first time, but, words will not adequately describe the pure joy. I never thought I could love another human the way I love my nephew. My heart literally feels like it’s exploding at the thought of him.

He is perfect. He is ours to love and nurture. He is without doubt our biggest blessing.

We got to see Connor in person very briefly but those moments are deeply imprinted in my heart.

We depend on pictures, videos and face time calls to bond with him. Not ideal but what can we do?! Bias aside, on the days when I feel like I’m going to drown with heaviness and despair (oh yes, I too have my down days) the thought of Connor gives me an instant boost of hope. A hope and a promise that just like the sun rises and sets each day, so too will this pandemic end.

When it will end we don’t know. But, what I do know is that we can and must keep hope alive… for ourselves and for Connor’s generation and those after.

Remain hopeful.

Remain thankful.

Spreading Christmas Love…

24 Tuesday Dec 2019

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Christmas is a season of renewed hope, joy, peace and unconditional love and these are the very seeds that the ladies from Yataghan Foundation, sowed recently. The team took to the streets of Durban to spread some festive cheer with less fortunate children and their parents.

Leader of Yataghan Foundation, Karen Wallace, said: “It’s our privilege and an honour to be able to reach out to those in need. Sharing a meal and a special treat with children who are ordinarily ‘forgotten’ at this time of the year is priceless. The hugs, the big smiles and the general excitement on their little faces is heart-warming.”

She added: “The stories the world over is full of doom and gloom; and while it’s easy to be caught up in that negativity, there is hope. For as long as we have the grace to go out and be a beacon of hope and love, our team will continue to serve the people of Durban and wherever there’s a need.”

Wallace and her team take to the streets of Durban almost every weekend to share a meal and an encouraging word with those who have no shelter. Their mandate is very clear – pay it forward, one meal and one moment at a time with unconditional love.

As you celebrate with your family and friends this Christmas, pause for a moment and consider reaching out to those in need. After all, this is a time for caring, sharing and giving… unconditionally!

We need each other…

19 Tuesday Nov 2019

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Since last week I’ve been house bound. Not out of choice, I must point out. I traipsed off to the office on Monday morning choosing to ignore the fact that I felt a little under the weather and was minus a voice. Oh the horror of not being able to speak; and some of my colleagues were finding this a delightful site to behold.

Long story short, one look at me and our medical team were mortified at the fact that I drove to the office instead of “calling” (read: text or mail) in sick. I tried to offer some sort of defense about it being a Monday blah-blah-blah but they were not interested. Instead, they armed me with the relevant meds, read me the riot (read: wellness act) and sent me on my way.

Chicken soup. Check.

Water. Check.

Fruit. Check.

Chocolate. Check.

Meds. Check.

I was ready for a week of “solitary confinement” and as someone who hardly ever gets sick, I figured this flu/laryngitis wouldn’t last more than three days. Boy, oh boy, was I wrong.

My body felt like it was being panel-beated and I just couldn’t break a stubborn fever. At that point my life seemed like it was a scene from Bridget Jones’s Diary. I couldn’t call anyone (the joys of being a migrant worker). I contemplated texting my neighbour to drive me to the ER but decided against this for two reasons: apart from an initial introduction and one other time I texted to apologise for triggering the alarm, we hadn’t really spoken. So imagine now asking him to be my personal uber? Even my feverish self knew this was a bad idea….

At the first glimpse of daylight, I drove to my GP and she confirmed it was no longer the flu but bronchitis. The good news was that the fever broke, I was given a much stronger antibiotic and my voice had returned but she warned me to “take it easy” because I wasn’t out of the woods just yet.

What’s the point of this post?

The aha-moment was this: words whether spoken, written or unsaid are equally important and define (positively/negatively) our lives more than we realise. More than that, we are emotional and social beings who need each other.

With a new year, a new decade mere days away, may we always choose to open our hearts and mouths… and always choose to express ourselves. That way we will have no regrets, no unanswered questions, lingering thoughts or feel like we can’t reach out for help when we need it most. After all, life is about stepping beyond the confines of our comfort zones and having the courage to speak up and reach out…

I think I’ve said this in a previous post, the reality is that no person is an island… we all need each other in one way or another; rain or shine.

Take care and stay fabulous….

I do, I do….

14 Sunday Jul 2019

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Earlier this year, I witnessed two people exchange vows before God and family in an intimate ceremony. It was the most beautiful, lump-in-throat wedding I’ve ever attended, and mainly because it was my baby brother Jarryd.

Gosh, it was just the other day that he was a toddler and now, thanks to God’s grace he is all grown and has matured into a responsible, young man. Witnessing him and Taslyn (or should I say Mrs Kast, as she loves telling us) exchange vows before God reminded me that while this might be 2019, and people prefer to “shack it up”, the sanctity of marriage still remains relevant and ever so important.

Forget the actual event for a second because that is not the focal point. It’s the firm foundation (read: God) and ultimate reason for this union that many appear to be overlooking these days.

Marriage is and should always be securely cemented on one thing and one thing alone – the Sovereign God whose unending love and teachings stand the test of time. Yes, love, commitment, devotion, honesty, trust and all those other things are important… after God has confirmed and established that two people should enter into the covenant of marriage.

The sanctity of marriage remains relevant…

It wasn’t long after we celebrated Jarryd and Taslyn’s *big* day, that I received news from two friends who will also be walking down the aisle later this year. The two are super thrilled and can’t wait to pronounce their love before God, family and friends. But, like my one friend pointed out that more than anything, they see their weddings as a reminder of God’s faithfulness in their respective lives. And that what He has predestined… joined together, nothing and no one can derail. (These two friends have the most amazing testimony and is a post for another day).

I’d like to encourage someone out there today, don’t be moved by your situation and hold onto the promise that God’s perfect plan always manifests at the appointed time. Any preconceived ideas or plans we might have about our lives means zero if it’s outside of the will of God.

For anyone who is married, feels challenged and as though you can’t go on then get on your knees and pray. Strong unions and solid families overflowing with love, kindness, compassion and all round goodness is what this world needs.

So fight. Fight through prayer (and fasting if need be) for your spouse and your family. There’s never been a more relevant time for us to pray for the preservation of the sanctity of marriage and restoration of families like right now… all for God’s glory.

Stay fabulous and favoured xxx

Rebound and recover…

30 Saturday Mar 2019

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I’m writing this post from the place I visited exactly two years ago. The view remains spectacular with a few extra “nice to see” things and my life has done a complete 360 in every possible way.

For those who read this blog, you would recall the plan was to take a one year sabbatical and then allow life to unfold. Well, the one year sabbatical did happen, just not the way I had envisaged. And the year that followed was anything but a stroll in the park.

As I reflect on the last two years, I don’t believe I can adequately describe the intensity of the challenges that knocked on my door. But, what I do know with every fibre of confidence is that God remains faithful.

When I tell you that I had no idea life could two feet you (it’s a Sydenham saying) and bring you to your knees… it can. It’s not pretty and it’s certainly painful at the “best” of times. I was tried and tested from every possible position but had the grace to press on because I knew that God remains faithful.

I am also extremely blessed to have a solid group of faith-filled women and men to support me unconditionally. They know who they are and to respect their privacy I will not mention their names. But, there is one woman who I believe is a complete angel on earth and who took me under her wing and wiped my tears and prayed me through the most dire times – Aunty Karen Wallace. She is more than amazing. She certainly epitomises God’s love and compassion. And has without doubt secured a special place in my heart.

I’m all about being fearlessly authentic, and when I say there were times I felt like I could not go on, that every ounce of my strength was depleted and the will to live was running on empty, but between God and aunty Karen, I’m alive and energised to continue walking on purpose.

And so, if at any point you find yourself at a place where you feel hopeless.

A place where you feel completely lost.

A place you where feel like a drifting yacht on a rough sea.

A place where you feel like nothing makes sense anymore.

A place where you feel like your heart has been ripped apart.

A place where you feel like you don’t want to open your eyes to face another day.

Know this… God has a plan. God is in complete control. God has your back. He created YOU with a specific purpose and all He expects is unwavering faith and complete obedience (no matter what the circumstances). He does not need you and I to help Him unfold the plan He designed perfectly and with the right time-frames. Just place your hope and trust in Him.

There were many lessons I’ve jotted down over the last 24months, one of the more crucial ones was to pay attention to the people who are willing to stand in the ring and take the punches with you; those real people (not the fair-weather types) who hold your head up and keep you standing and smiling.

Most importantly, don’t fight the separation process. We know that some people are only meant to be in our lives for a reason, season and lifetime. Holding onto someone whose expiration date has come and gone will cause more chaos and distraction. Again, just trust God’s lead.

And finally, it’s perfectly fine to release (forgive) and love some people (family included) from a distance. Anything or anyone that threatens or obstructs your peace and Divine purpose has no place in your life.

If you are reading this post and find yourself in need of encouragement, allow me to suggest that you pour your heart out to God… be still enough to listen to His voice (yes, He still speaks) and hold onto your faith like never before.

And once you’ve allowed yourself to heal, stand up boldly and go out there and rise and thrive… because God can and will always be the anchor, compass and all-round Navigator you need at any given moment.

Love. Love. And more love coupled with equal portions of boundless faith, grace and mercy be yours this day and always!

When I look back…

28 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

… I sigh a breath of relief because it’s only through God’s grace that I remain standing; and able to share this post.

If ever there was a year that showed me flames, it was 2018. I shall spare you the detail but if you remember anything from this post, know that whatever and whoever is sent to put a spoke in the wheels of your destiny, it will not succeed. I say this confidently because boy, oh, boy… did they come fast and furiously. And each attempt was thwarted and came to naught, thanks to the Hand of God over my life.

I cried a lot this year.
It was a combination of tears of joy and tears of sorrow; some I personally experienced and others I witnessed.

There were tears for the disappointment in the way some prospective projects folded.
There were tears for the disappointment in the way some people (including family) behaved.
There were tears for the disappointment in the way some people chose to defeat the ends of justice to save face instead of taking responsibility for their untoward choices/decisions.
There were tears for the disappointment in the way some associations dissolved before they even took off.
There were tears for the disappointment in the way some people used people as pawns in their game of life.
There were tears for the disappointment in the way some people choose to continue along the path of a dysfunctional façade knowing full well that these actions have a domino effect.

Some of the hardest tears were for the ties that I chose to sever in the name of self-preservation and peace of mind. Like my mentor pointed out, ‘Jesus did not resurrect Judas and neither should you’. And also, forgiveness does not equate to re-association.

So in all the tears, pain and disappointment, I’m most grateful for the fact that it brought me to my knees and made me draw closer to God. There was many a night I was face flat on the floor either crying out in prayer or having these heated debates with God trying to figure out the why. Until, one morning, He whispered “be still and trust Me”.

And when that penny dropped, the journey became more enjoyable and the revelations came about sooner and more clearly.

With the start of the New Year just days away, I continue to look ahead with great expectation, an open heart and confident that He that started a good work will make sure it manifests as and when it should.

As you embrace 2019:

May you honour yourself (and your space) and enforce the relevant boundaries.
Let your no be no and your yes, be yes.
May you walk in purpose and never compromise the work you are called to do, all for His glory.
May you never settle for anything less than you deserve.

More importantly, may your heart be filled with perfect peace, undiluted joy and gratitude for all things (big and small).

Love. Love. And more love to you and yours for 2019 and beyond…

It’s the most wonderful time…

14 Friday Dec 2018

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

… of the year. Indeed it is a time where family and friends gather to feast on all things festive. But, for some, it’s the loneliest and saddest time too… for various reasons.

As we go through the motions of this holiday season, I would like to encourage us to be more mindful of the next person – whether known or a random stranger. Sharing a simple smile, marshmallow, singing carols or taking the time to listen, will do someone out there a world of good. Even better still, it will reignite a sense of dignity and worth to a soul whose focus is purely embedded in pain.

From me to you… I pray the pure joy, eternal hope and perfect peace that the birth of Jesus Christ offers the world is always stored in your heart and home. May your days be peppered with ladles of love and laughter. Be safe.

Blessings always xox

love and christmas

Feelings and forgiveness…

29 Sunday Apr 2018

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

We’ve all been in situations (with one or more people) where things went south rather quickly and some sort of disagreement results in a few bruised egos and frazzled feelings.

And normally such situations are not too difficult to handle if it involves strangers – and so forgiveness almost seems effortless. It’s those situations where someone very close – family, friend or folk from church – does something that makes no sense… and forgiveness takes on a whole new meaning.

Such times are designed to either send our emotions into overdrive, and or to rob us of our joy. And it’s usually in these moments, that it’s easy to think the unkindest thoughts about the person(s) who we believe has caused us pain.

Recently, I experienced something that made me feel like my world was tumbling down. And instinctively, I called a friend – because let’s face it – we like to vent before we fall on our knees.
And, it was after I ended that call, that I realised I didn’t have to call because I wasn’t alone… God is always right there with us… even in the height of the storm.

I also thought, as shattered as I was feeling, I’m not God and can’t possibly stand in judgement of any person.
Secondly, what does Luke 6:27, 28 tell us we ought to do when people hurt us:
“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”

Emotions aside, putting scripture into practice is not a mission impossible. And why do I say this? Because I believe that our default settings are kindness and love and so if we choose them over the anger, bitterness and possibly even a grudge then embracing the concept of forgiveness becomes easier.

Take a moment to think… is there someone who has upset you, someone who you need to forgive and release?

Beloved, love covers a multitude of sins.
This day, let us choose to recommit our lives, our hearts and all that we are to walk in love and kindness…

The luxury of simplicity…

10 Friday Mar 2017

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I like open, uncluttered spaces.

I don’t hoard (thankfully) and spring clean every now and then to make sure I only have what I need at that point in time.

With my last house move, I promised myself that that would be the last time. Well, that wasn’t to be and a few weeks ago, I found myself packing up and moving. Again.

After much thought, I decided to take a sabbatical. In terms of the time factor, well that’s a post for another day.

Back  to the move…

With my previous house moves, I had my bff also known as my brother, Jarryd Kast, on hand to help (read: do most of the work). This time it was just me and my helper, Hazel. Now, if ever there was an angel on earth, Hazel would be that person.

Where Jarryd would take the lead and ensure all the ducks were in a row, this time round Hazel fulfilled that role. Super organised and super efficient is an understatement. The actual day of the move, we got moving bright and early which allowed me time to have lunch with a very dear friend, before I hit the road.

This move made me realise…

Half the stuff we have is hardly ever utilised regularly (if at all) and we realise this only when it’s time to move. I found a blender, pasta maker, a blouse and a jacket, all with price tags still on.  What a complete waste… that was until, I decided these items would be better off elsewhere. And that’s how “operation give-away” unfolded.

I gave away most things and kept just a few necessities. Of course my mother thought I had lost the plot and asked if I was smoking something. The truth is, I don’t know how long this sabbatical is going to be and my thinking is why hold on to things that another family a) needs and b) would make better use of.

So, with the few belongings I chose to keep tucked away in storage, I feel light. I don’t have that nagging feeling about what if the lounge suite, fridge, microwave, kettle, toaster, iron breaks or is no longer working when this sabbatical is over. I know that the family that was blessed with these things are happier and these items are making everyday life that much more comfortable for them.

The other bonus is that when it’s time to take that next step, I’ll be travelling light. Who needs excess baggage anyway?!

Thank you for taking the time to read.

Stay fabulous and favoured xxx

20150123_192523